Love Is All in the Head
The concept of love is one that’s easy to define but hard to achieve. Love encompasses a wide range of positive and strong emotional and psychological states, from absolute love to the utmost personal pleasure, the best intimate relationship, the greatest friend, or even the worst nightmare. There are many types of love and they come in different colors, sizes, and shades.
The biggest difficulty in defining love lies in the fact that we all have different personalities. When someone is in love they are more likely to focus on their qualities and experiences rather than their flaws or other negative characteristics. While it’s hard to think of a single characteristic that can be identified as the core trait of love, there are several psychological states that can be considered to be a general “love liking”. Some of these include being attached to a significant other, having frequent and open conversations about intimate matters, being open and honest about your own feelings and needs, sharing your own joy and happiness, appreciating someone else’s achievements and intelligence, identifying with another person’s spirit, and being able to accept the love of a new partner. Basically, anyone who fits into these three traits is considered to be in a love state.
Neurophysiology has shown that our brains contain neurons that are highly active when we’re involved in passionate love relationships. These areas of the brain actually increase in size when we experience true romantic love. In fact, lovers tend to crave love, especially when they have been together for a long period of time. The reason why this occurs is because one another is tuning into each others’ brain regions and enjoying the sensations of one another’s presence. Our bodies are very responsive to physical contact and intimacy, so when two people engage in love making or are in a relationship they are tapping into one another’s neurophysiological systems. It’s just a matter of experiencing the right kind of stimulation for the right amount of time to activate these brain regions.
Another area of the brain that receives heightened levels of activity is the midbrain, which is responsible for the processing of emotions. People who are deeply in love tend to have stronger emotional responses, especially if they have lost their loved ones. When we are in love we have stronger emotions, including joy, elation, compassion, nostalgia, longing, anger, desire, and joy. During our relationships we are constantly accessing these different emotions and using them to facilitate relationships. This is great news for the person in love because this means they will have access to more powerful feelings that can help them create a fulfilling life. However, if you’re the person in a relationship who is often deprived of these emotions because you are always experiencing conflict, you may find yourself battling anxiety, depression, and other negative feelings that are unhealthy and do nothing to enhance your relationship.
To cultivate stronger feelings of love in your romantic relationships you must make an effort to spend some time with those who you love. Practicing the art of romance doesn’t mean that you have to spend countless hours at the gym or that you have to lock yourself in a dark room. While practicing being intimate with another person doesn’t mean that you have to visit a therapist, it does mean that you have to allow yourself to be vulnerable and open to another person fully and completely.
If you and the one you love are practicing the art of romance regularly, but you still find that you’re not fully satisfied with the quality of your relationships, consider making an appointment with a psychologist. There might be some underlying issues that are keeping your relationship from being a healthy relationship. A professional is a great resource when it comes to sharing your feelings and helping you overcome any issues you might be having. It’s okay to look for support from a professional, even if they are not really a therapist. You never know, they may be able to provide you with the guidance and emotional health you need to start loving someone else.