Most people use the word “love” in two different contexts. One context involves the love of a parent for their child. The other context involves the love of an individual for another individual. In this article I want to show why love is not at all identical with attachment.
The word “love” is most commonly used in relation to the first definition: a deep feeling of total, undivided affection for another person or thing. Most of us, however, define “love” as an emotion. Again, because they view love as an emotion, the old definition hides the fact that you don’t love somebody until you hurt them. You don’t love somebody until you hate them or feel guilty about hurting them.
What most people fail to realize is that love is also a mental state. It differs from attachment in that love is not dependent on anything tangible. Although love can be dependent on things such as food, shelter and clothing, it certainly does not require these things. To love somebody means to unconditionally love them no matter what they do not do.
Attachment on the other hand, is often based on a more tangible base. For example, your mother loves you even when you hurt her. To love your mother you must love and unconditionally trust her. However, you can never let her know how much you love her unless you tell her. She needs to see and know how much you care.
While love and attachment are opposites, they also have very similar characteristics. You cannot love someone unless you feel some form of attachment to them. The only way to develop true love is to be selfless. You must love yourself first before you can love others.
While it may seem difficult to find true love, it is possible. If you are honest with yourself about your desires for others you will eventually find true love. When you are honest about your needs and desires, you will be able to connect with other people. Then you can develop true love and attach that to them. You will love them because you love yourself first.
Think of love as an experience rather than an event. You might get so excited about meeting someone new and think you are in love. Then you get the realization that you will probably never meet this person because you are incompatible. Then you realize you were just in lust and you were fooling yourself.
It’s important to maintain healthy levels of excitement about love. Love is an ongoing feeling. Attraction is a temporary feeling. It doesn’t last forever. You have to understand that love is an emotion, it will fade.
It’s also important to remember that love is a beautiful feeling. Don’t fall victim to the frustration of falling out of love. Instead try to stay positive. You will eventually come back to love. Remember, it’s okay to feel angry or depressed but don’t let it take over the way you live your life.